Thursday, November 29, 2012

Sticks and Stones............

Obese Mannequin Offends Some Reddit Users

 Take a minute to go to the above link and look it over.

Before I go on...

 Is it just me or are the similarities uncanny?

I read the above article today on the way home from a conference in Omaha. Don't worry, I wasn't driving. On the three hour commute, I also had a chance to read through some of the debate on the Reddit Website. I want to take the time to address those with the negative responses, not that they will ever see it or be enlightened enough to process it, but perhaps it will give me some peace of mind.

I am more than a little offended by some of the statements that I read. I realized that most of those negative comments are made by passive-aggressive morons who hide behind a generic screen name and terrorize others in an attempt to make themselves feel better about their menial lives. I have my doubts that if one of those individuals, who were so bold, in the comfort of the cyber world, were standing in front of me (or any other overweight person) they would be so brazen. It's pry a good thing because I would most likely go a lil Redneck on their dumb asses.

Having sometime to process this, I was able to distinquish the true difference between me and the "fat haters" and it has nothing to do with weight. It 100 percent has to do with perception. Perceptions of themselves and those different from them.  My parents taught me to stand up for myself and for what I believe in. They taught me integrity. They taught me that I had value and worth and that those two things have absolutely nothing to do with the size of jeans that I wear. Every day growing up, they told me I was beautiful. They told me that I could be anything I wanted to be. They spents years building up what strangers could knock down in a series of words.   I have to step back and realize that not every one was blessed with the support system that I have.  Most likely, no one ever  took the time to tell them they were worthwhile.

I am in no way promoting my body size or lifestyle choices. I accept complete responsibility for being overweight. It was my choices and mine alone that lead me to where I am. I am fat but for the most part, I consider myself healthy and each day I feel a little bit healthier. Even if from this point on I didn't lose anymore weight I would be okay. I am reminded of my friend, Whitney's words, that the battle I am fighting right now is not about weight, it's about health. I want to get healthy and be healthy.

I have spent my whole life being the fat girl. I have smiled and pretended it was okay when people (friends and even family) made comments and jokes about my weight or other overweight people. I held my head high when people said these horrible things about how I look, because I was taught that I was better than cruel words-that they do not define me. In my mind, I know that both of those things are true, it's just my heart that I sometimes have to convince.

 My personal favorite was when someone came up to me and said, "Laura,  You're never going to get married until you lose some weight." Really? Really?  Had I been thinking on my toes, I would have said, "That's funny because you found a husband and you're ugly AND have no personality." Good thing ladies don't say such things. :) The fact that I am not married couldn't have any correlation with the fact that the majority of guys in the area are D-bags, now could it?

All of this rambling on an article about a mannequin....sheesh..... I think the part that I was most bothered by was the fact that being plus-sized is synonymous with ugliness. Notice that the depicted mannequin's hair is not done and that she is not wearing make up. That is absolutely accurate, fat people don't care enough about themselves to even bother looking decent. I like to think that although I am overweight, that I usually look presentable ( Please note that I use the term presentable rather loosely if when you see me falls on a weekend). To my knowledge,I don't think people meet me on the street and want to throw up, but I guess, I could be mistaken. I have found that the people that truly matter in life care far more about what's inside of your head than outside.


People are always going to find something to be conflicted about. The people on the Reddit website are worried that obesity is going to be considered the norm.   I, however, am worried about living a world where I have to tell my daughter or son that they will be judged by how they look, not who they are....that's the kind of shit that keeps me up at night.

Thursday, November 22, 2012


In true Thanksgiving spirit I thought it would only be fitting to take the time to express some of the things that I am thankful for each and every day.

My Parents- I share my last name with two of the craziest people who have ever graced this earth. They are also the greatest people who have ever lived. Two people who have never been handed anything in their life. They have worked their asses off for all that they have. They taught me that I could achieve anything that I wanted. They gave me roots and wings and told me I could be anything we wanted to be. They have been the greatest example of unconditional love, honesty, and integrity. Apparently, being stubborn and hard-headed are recessive traits; and because of this I am not afraid to stand my ground and fight for what I believe in. For that, I 
                                                                                                       will always be thankful.
                                                                                             Love you both to the moon and back!

Jennifer- The sister that God forgot to give me. It's probably a good thing that she isn't my biological sibling, being as though she married my brother, because, if I am not mistaken, that is illegal and generally frowned upon, unless, of course, we resided in Arkansas. :) I will forever be thankful that she is a part of my life. I am all the better for knowing her. She taught me that family has less to do with blood and more to do with love. She is also one of the strongest people I have ever me. She has been through so much and yet she never gives up hope. I love you, big sister.

Ethan- I am thankful for the 23 years I was given with my brother. I am thankful for his support, for his friendship, and for his laughter.

My Family- I am thankful for the rest of my crazy family. Again, some of the greatest people to ever live and by far, the funnest. We all share an unrelenting bond that transcends generations. I love you all so much.

My Friends- I have the greatest friends ever! Each and every one of them different but all so wonderful in their own way. Some that I have known forever and some only a short time, yet all of them fantastic. It doesn't matter if I see them every day or once a year, we all just pick right up where we left off. Also, it is an amazing feeling knowing that when "the chips are down" that my friends will be there, no questions asked. Thank you all for being you.

Second Chances- Every day I am thankful for second chances. I am thankful that I have been given the opportunity to make the life changes necessary to be healthy. I am thankful that my wake up call came before it was too late. I am also thankful for all of the support that everyone has showed me in this journey. You are all wonderful.

Work Out Buddies- I am thankful for my Nichole and Deb, standing by me, and giving me the motivation to consistently work out, even when I don't want to and make about a bizillion excuses not to do it. Thank you for not dealing with my nonsense and for listening to me complain-You guys are the best work out buddies, ever.


It has been a while since my last blog and  I have some fun updates.......

 At my last weigh-in, I was down 34 pounds!!!!!!!!- Small progress, in the long battle that I have ahead of me but, progess, none the less. I am proud because each and every pound was a hard-fought battle. A battle between what I wanted to eat and what I did eat. The choice is up to me. This time, I will win. I am not saying that I am the portrait of healthy eating all the time. I don't always make the best food choices but I make adjustments and know that I don't have to deprive myself to be successful. The key is to always get back on track. I also think alot about the battle I have losing the weight, I know that the battle to keep the weight off will be a lifetime one but a small price to pay for a long life.

I run now..... without anyone chasing me. Okay, I use the term run pretty loosely, because, it is more of a SLOW jog, but dammit, it is way more than I was doing just a few short months ago. I "run" for about 30 seconds and then walk for several minutes, ya know, until my oxygen levels return to a safe level. It's exciting and frustrating and exhilirating, all at the same time....

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Temporary Bouts of Insanity......

Pahaha....More like permanent bouts of insanity mixed with short periods of lucidity.......story of my life.

 I have some exciting news. My friend, Nichole and I have registered for The Warrior Dash this coming June!!!!! It's officially, official. Until yesterday, I had no idea what The Warrior Dash was but like all paramount decisions in my life, I first agreed and then gathered the facts. Little did I know that this race would entail mud bogging, barbed wire, wall climbing, and FIRE. My inner-pyro was more than a little pumped about the fire aspect.

I know what you are all pondering to yourselves..."I have never seen Laura Whitesel run." And that thought would be absolutely accurate. I am not much of a runner. In fact, I hate running. It doesn't even look fun. I have always maintained that one should not run unless they are being chased.... So why did I agree to an extreme 5K, you ask? Well, that is simple-I am nuts. Plus, it's not a huge secret that I may have problems with moderation. So something like The Warrior Dash seems right up my alley.

 I am at a point where I have found myself at many, many times before. The only thing different this time is that the story doesn't end here. I am picking myself up and brushing myself off because I may have stumbled but this time I will not fall. Nichole suggesting The Warrior Dash couldn't have come at a better time. This last week I have been lacking in inclination. I am eating things that I know I shouldn't. I am not exercising like I should be. I needed that push. I needed some motivation. Knowing that I have already registered holds me accountable. It also gives me something to be excited about and something to work towards. I also forgot to mention that each registrant will receive their very own viking hat. I'm not trying to brag or anything but I'm fairly certain Nichole and I will make pretty B.A. vikings.

I am all about setting attainable goals so because this is my first run I am only going to have two very simple goals. 1) Survival-my greatest hope is to live through the race :) 2) Finish the race-it doesn't matter if I am the last one to cross the finish line six days later, I am going to do it.

Stay tuned for all the training shenanigans.....there's bound to be a few good stories involved.