Sunday, March 24, 2013

Are you out there?

 If the timeline of my life would have went as I had always planned it, I would have been several years into marriage and beginning my own family, living the "American Dream".  I was wrong.  Ten years ago, I hadn't even given my college education a second thought and a graduate degree wasn't even anything I had ever imagined, in my wildest dreams...but here I am Master's Degree in hand and a continued journey within my career. My path has lead me down a much different direction than I think anyone could have imagined, trust me, no one is more shocked about this than I.

Lately, I have been painfully aware that I am one of the few in my  group of friends that hasn't met that special someone and settled down. The majority of my friends are married and having kids and it just feels like our lives are on two entirely different spectrums. Don't get me wrong, I am content with my life and enjoy the hell out of it, however, one day I would like to plan a real wedding, not just my imaginary Pintrest wedding. :)

I don't want to tempt fate or anything. I believe everything happens in due time......but I can't help but wonder....

 Maybe we have yet to meet or perhaps he has been there the whole time and the universe never lined up perfectly. Maybe he is a wild card, someone no one could have ever imagined I'd end up with or maybe it is so painfully obvious that we were meant to be together that no one saw it coming. These things I won't know until they have happened. The list of unknowns is endless although there are a few things I can tell you for certain about him:

His family is his number one priority. He does an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Maybe in an office, maybe in a tractor, please God, not in a KFC uniform. He is the funniest guy in the whole me. He makes me laugh more than anyone else.  He gets my off color sense of humor and forgives my tendency to be melodramatic. He finds my awkwardness sexy. He is strong in his morals and knows exactly who he is. He loves his mom and dad and he strives to make them proud each and every day, much like I do.

He will know that I am a feminist contradiction. He understands that I expect to be treated equal to any man but I also don't mind having the door opened for me and Heaven help him if he walks into a room ahead of me. He will know that he will never get to lead while dancing ever again.  He is patient with my short-comings and not afraid to call me on my bullshit. He will learn to love the fact that I always think I am right even when I am blatantly wrong....He can thank my mother for this inherited trait.

He forgives me when I am being ridiculous and doesn't judge my habit of throwing around the "F" word. He will be blessed with a tough exterior, a soft heart, and an open mind. He will be secure enough with his masculinity to know that my speaking to a member of the opposite sex does not mean our relationship is doomed. He will know that when I make a commitment to someone it is for forever, not just a while. If I love you once, I probably always will.

 He will shake my dad's hand and look him in the eye when he speaks to him and he will know that you never, ever sit in Kendall's chair while visiting.  He will tell my mom that she is beautiful and he will make her laugh and make her love him too, because if Momma Whitesel ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.He will have the foresight to ask my dad for my hand before he proposes, regardless of how old we are and will not run for the hills when my dad tells him, "Remember, she's your problem now".

He will know how to stack a hay trailer correctly and if not he better at least fake enthusiasm in learning how because like it our not he will be the newest non-paid employee of Whitesel Custom Hay. The pay sucks and the benefits are awful and the work conditions leave a little to be desired but it will be one of the greatest jobs he ever holds.

He will be understanding when my sister lives with us our first year of marriage and laugh that she is only returning the favor from when Ethan and she took me into their home during the first year they were married. I was the 22 year-old child that they never wanted. I can only imagine that Jennifer is going to pay that forward.

And may I have the an open mind to see what is right in front of me and an open heart to be everything he needs me to be. May our life together be long and happy and full of surprises.........
I know he is out there. He may not be everything I always thought I wanted but he will be everything I need. I don't know when or where we will meet but when the time comes, I am ready. ...

Friday, March 1, 2013

Whole 30

I've been doing a great deal of research on what the best eating plans consist of.. I've really been focusing on the Paleo-approach.I just finished reading, It Starts With Food by Dallas and Melissa Hartwig and Charles Hunt's, Eat Fat, Get Fit. Both focus on our dietary needs from a very primal standpoint.

So, today I started the Whole 30 plan. Basically, it removes sugar, artificial sweeteners, bread, grains, flours, alcohol, simple carbs, dairy and anything  processed from your diet for the next 30 days. There's a lot of mumbo-jumbo that goes along with it. I'll spare you the boring details. Pretty much, I am allowed to eat meat, non-starchy fresh vegetables, raw nuts, and fresh fruit. It also allows for oils such as EVOO and Coconut oil. This diet sounded so rational when I was reading the damn books, however, while I am actually living it, I am less than convinced. Day 1 apparently is an easy day.....Easy, my ass.

They say the hurdles comes with days 2-4. This is when your body is in some sort of wicked food hangover as it purges all the toxins and build-up from your Research shows that eating all the above listed food on the naughty, no-no list send our biological make-up into some sort of crisis state which leads to lots of potential complications.  Approximately, 16 hours in and I would auction off my first born for a Diet Mountain Dew.

I did some grocery shopping this afternoon. Shopping is not near as fun when you have to check the labels on absolutely everything..... Sometime take a look at the ingredients in some of your favorite foods. Chances are you can't pronounce half of them. Shouldn't we know what we are putting in out bodies?

Both books mentioned the use of coconut oil, for cooking, not sunbathing, of course. I was kind of hesitant to get any because it is kind of pricey and I wasn't sure I wanted to spend a lot of money on something I wasn't sure I was going to like. Today, I was pretty much a renegade, and decided to try it any way. OMG, I SURE AM GLAD I DID! It is absolutely delicious plus it smells like a day at the beach while it is heating up. I pan fried some salmon in it tonight.YUM!  I also made a lettuce salad with hard boiled egg, avocado, fresh salsa, and a dash of vinegar.  I'm attaching a picture at the end, cuz I think it's kind of pretty.

I'm being a tad melodramatic. It will all buff out. Get through the next few days and it will be smooth sailing....

P.S. I really could use a beer. :)

Supper-Day 1